The Area of Wimps and Crybabies

Why on earth is it that men don't behave like men?
Why do they mistake girlfriends as mother-replacements?

Just to illustrate:
I was walking along a way with a guy. Suddenly a snake appears, crossing the street. For the record: I've never seen a real snake in nature before. The guy was 6 years older than me.
Anyway, I was like "eek, look at that!" And the guy? He screamed, jumped backwards and hid behind me ¬.¬ And the next day he's showing off telling me he'd do workout everyday... Aha

So, what I wanna know now:
What happened to the Stone Age hunting and protecting instinct all u guys are so proud of?
Why is it that I get phoned up in the middle of the night at least twice a week and have to listen to an adult man crying because his girlfriend was mean?
Why is a man hiding behind my back because a snake is crossing the street?
Why do I have to kill the spider?
Why do they always always ask for my permission or opinion on totally unimportant stuff whereas they actually could just show some determination?
Why are there more persons starring into the mirror and styling themselves in the men's toilet than there are in the women's?
Why do we have to pause every second hour 'cause HE has to pee?
WHY do men, straight men, carry around handbags and wear pink shirts??

Guys
I can't take this serious anymore.
You're on the verge of transforming into pitiful little wimps.
Go Get Emancipated!!

...Tsk